Kathy, from Huntington Beach, California, writes in about elder abuse concerns.
She is 88 and just recently fell. She was taken to the ER with her three neighbors by her side.
She told the Doctor her son pushed her and wouldn’t let her out of the house. Police are calling son was arrested and released.
He drinks! She is now saying that isn’t what happened.
She is in a skilled nursing home but did not do the 3 day in the hospital. There was paperwork about she is having to pay now and she signed it.
She is drugged up and doesn’t even know what is she doing. I visited her and she was passing out all the time.
They wont tell us anything and no one is helping her. Making her sign papers when she doesn’t even remember who was there to visit isn’t helping her.
Her son has POA and isn’t even allowed to talk with her.
What can we do, if anything to help. I lost my mom a few years ago and I have been doing things for and so have the other two ladies that where with her that night.
We just what to know what her medical coverage, so we can help her not loose everything she has.
Can anyone help me [email protected]
I am so sorry to hear about this situation. Elder abuse is a terrible thing to deal with and your neighbor was not in a good situation.
The hard part right now is getting things sorted out so that she remains safe.
As a neighbor, no one can give you any information because of HIPPA laws. They are imposed for privacy. It is so frustrating when you cannot get any information, it makes you feel helpless.
Since your neighbor is in a nursing home and did not have a 3 day stay in the hospital. She is private pay while in the nursing home at this time.
I do not know her financial situation, but, she will be responsible for a lot of money. IF she owns a home, after her savings and other assets are depleted, a lien will be placed against the house.
If she is sole owner, the house will help pay for the nursing home.
I know that this is upsetting to hear, but it may be the best place for her.
I do have some concerns that need to be addressed. If she is signing papers under sedation, which is not ethical.
My suggestion to you is to call the state ombudsman and have them investigate the situation. Adult protective services should have been notified about her situation as well.
I understand how you and the other ladies want to help your neighbor. How you can best help her is the question.
There are many things you must consider. What are your friend’s immediate needs, and what are her long-term needs?
Does she have any other family members that could advocate for her?
We do not know her diagnosis. I am very concerned about her sedation and the reason for it.
At the present time she is in a safe environment. It may not be the best place, but is there any other alternative at this point?
My suggestion to you is to call the ombudsman for the facility. Have them go in and investigate the situation. At this point in time, that is the only recourse you have.
Ask them to investigate her situation – the sedation, her signing papers under duress.
You are in a tough spot as a neighbor. But, if you want to support this lady, the best you can do is visit. And call the ombudsman when you think that there is a problem. They will investigate.
Please understand that the facility HATES when the ombudsman is called. But, it does get results.
The facility may have to make her a ward of the state. If they find that she is not mentally competent and the son has been abusing her.
Please let me know what the results of this situation as they unfold.
You are a good, kind and caring individual. Your neighbor is so blessed to have you in her life.
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